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The Heptathlon of Life: Why You Can’t Win Every Event (And Why You Shouldn’t Try)

The Heptathlon of Life: Why You Can’t Win Every Event (And Why You Shouldn’t Try)

As a psychologist, I often see clients who are exhausted, anxious, and feel like they are constantly failing. They aren’t lazy or unmotivated; in fact, they are some of the most driven people I’ve met. They are caught in a trap, one that I call the “Perfectionist’s Heptathlon.” The heptathlon is one of the most […]

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child reaching for her mother, seemingly rejecting her father who is reaching out to her.

From Chopped Liver to Braai Master: Navigating Fatherhood’s Unspoken Heartbreak

Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month offers a crucial platform to speak about the silent struggles many fathers face – struggles often unacknowledged and unsupported. As a psychologist, I spend my days helping others navigate the complexities of the human mind. But today, I want to share a deeply personal journey. It’s one that laid bare

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Modern living room with a comfortable grey sofa, wooden coffee tables, and soft natural lighting, creating a calm and inviting atmosphere conducive to conversation

Dear Worried Parent: Therapy’s Door Only Opens From the Inside (For Your Adult Child)

As a therapist, my inbox often contains heartfelt, sometimes desperate, pleas from parents. These are parents who love their adult children deeply, who see them struggling – perhaps with anxiety, depression, career uncertainty, relationship issues, or a general sense of being adrift – and they believe, often quite rightly, that therapy could help. Their desire

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Perfectionism and Neurodiversity – Managing the Pressure to be Perfect

The Hidden Struggles of Perfectionism in Neurodiverse Adults

  Many adults struggle with perfectionism, but for neurodiverse individuals, it can be especially overwhelming. The constant pressure to meet unrealistic standards—whether self-imposed or influenced by societal expectations—can lead to anxiety, burnout, and even avoidance of tasks altogether. For neurodiverse adults, including those with ADHD, autism, dyslexia, or other learning differences, perfectionism often manifests differently.

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Two people sitting close together, with one person resting their head on the other's shoulder, symbolizing support and compassion

Are You Too Hard on Yourself? Why Self-Compassion is the Secret to Thriving with ADHD

The Importance of Self-Compassion When Dealing with ADHD   Living with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) can be challenging, often leading to feelings of frustration, inadequacy, and self-criticism. For many individuals with ADHD, managing symptoms like inattention, impulsivity, and hyperactivity can feel overwhelming. This is where self-compassion becomes crucial. Self-compassion involves treating yourself with kindness, understanding, and

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Person doomscrolling on their phone, representing dopamine-driven impulsive behavior linked to ADHD

Is ADHD Hijacking Your Brain? How Dopamine Drives Your Impulses—And 7 Ways to Take Back Control

Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is closely linked to the brain’s dopamine system. Dopamine is a neurotransmitter that plays a critical role in reward, motivation, and pleasure. For individuals with ADHD, the regulation of dopamine can be particularly challenging, leading to behaviors that seek instant gratification. These dopamine-seeking behaviors, while providing short-term pleasure, can often lead to

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Person taking a pill, representing the use of medication to manage ADHD symptoms

Is ADHD Medication Really the Magic Bullet? Uncover the Truth Behind Its Effectiveness and What You Need to Know

The Effectiveness of ADHD Medication: What You Need to Know Overview Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is a condition that affects millions of adults worldwide. One of the most common treatments for managing ADHD symptoms is medication. But how effective are these medications, and who should consider them? The Effectiveness of ADHD Medication ADHD medications, particularly stimulants

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A messy pile of books representing disorganization and the challenges of executive functioning in adults with ADHD

Struggling to Stay Organized? ADHD may be Sabotaging Your Executive Functioning— 5 Tips to consider.

Understanding the Link Between Adult ADHD and Executive Functioning Overview Adult ADHD is often associated with difficulties in attention, impulsivity, and hyperactivity. However, a lesser-known but equally impactful aspect of ADHD is its effect on executive functioning. Executive functioning refers to a set of cognitive processes that help us manage and regulate our behavior, emotions,

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